What a week, all my test are completed…
And most of my results are border line passes.
Used to be demoralised and all, but this time I’m more determined to work harder!
So many things happened this week! Probably because it’s my busy week!

This week feels great!
Did so many things that I couldn’t do…

And most of the time.. i was gaming and having a great time!

Better get down to full adreneline for the upcoming exams man.

Meantime, figured i better keep some form of memory for Xtreme Chaotix…

Heard rumours here and there that the clan’s going astray or something,

but whatever it is, kinda established a bond within team [X]tC.

And although half the team’s younger than me…

It’s great to keep in contact with each other everynow and then!

xF. < X!@nG+iaN > .:[X]tC:.
Name: Xiang Tian
NCC enthusiast, ACS Barker guy, Pro-assaulter, remove-cucumber-from-california-handroll homosapean.

xF. < Grim Reaper > .:[X]tC:.
Name: Kin Seng
NUS Engineering Year 1, my teammate in the NUS team I led,
investigating possible capacity the human Oral cavity can hold.

xF. < Rarus > .:[X]tC:.
Name: Benny
24 year old Pro-Gamer, PS2 & XBox discount king,
Sniper enthusiast, Singapore Road Map system programmed in his Brain.

xF. < Predator > .:[X]tC:.
Name: K.C
Roald Dahl’s Big Friendly Giant, Young ACS Baker Boy,
NCC Enthusiast, fetish for Rifles and Guns,
Team Leader for XtC,
 currently minoring in the field of Vocal expression through shouting.

These are the 4 great people in the team I’m in,
And should be the confirmed players that will participate for WCG 2005.
Really like this team of guys… ain’t the predictable Ah Beng type,
nor the arrogant young kids that are a third my height,
but basically normal friendly nice people that have great gaming instincts!

---

Was in Suntec City for Church today,
and while heading back to the parking lot,
there it was… Chess pieces that were little Gundam Seed models!
Couldn’t help but get one of them.
And for $11.90 and the size of no taller than an average handphone,
It’s rather cute, and looks a teeny weeny small….

The Abyss…

---

UGH!
Think I just love the little video I made.
Or maybe It’s because I just love the song.
Or maybe it’s because i like Gundam Seed Series?
None the less, I love it! hahaha think I’ll make some other little clips from other stuff..
Which could possibly imply that I should get a Video Camera Recorder?
If
and only if I could have the money to spend, such that the money I use
is “sponsored” from another external source that lies outside the
domain of my personal savings.
Where shall i get this? Perhaps at a shop? Must take a closer look…
However,
by the Heseinberg uncertainty principle, it would be impossible to
determine its exact location if we were to measure its momentum, while
it would be impossible to know its momentum (capabilites) if we had an
exact notion of its position in space.
And there’s a possibility
that exist such that the recorder would pass through my hand and drop
to the ground by Schrodinger’s equation.
Though this value is to a magnitude of one of zillions, but is still exist,
which implies I shouldn’t get a recorder.

Too much Physics damages the mind.

---

 I’m horrified, mortified, annihilated and left to rot,
by that overly simple Physics Paper that left me struggling to survive.
Feeling bad because you didn’t study is alright.
Feeling bad because the paper was stuff is alright too.
But in my case, i was simply… Careless.
I feel ridiculed that I actually intergrated the wrong variable,
or whether I didn’t do my tutorial early to discover that I = J.dA
None the less, I hope I’ll pull up my grades in the final year exam.

And this is my new whiteboard. Bought it to do physics in my room.
Shown in this pic, the artist tries to fully encapture the essence of Biot-Savart’s Law, Gauss’s Law & Ampere’s Law.

And just when I was preparing for my Calculus test,
My enthusiastic neighbour Benny arranged a get-together for the Dota Gamers!
We’ve been playing Dota since last semester, and it was here that i learnt it well.
And last night at 11pm the 12 of us met face to face,
to see the true identity of the pros that we always play with everynight.
Great meeting you guys!
Nice to meet Piggo, Achu, LK, Genesis, Bentoh, Starmax, and the rest of them!
And before we left and walked back to PGP I bought a copy of Playworks Magazine.
And in it… i saw this…

That’s the Team I was leading for the IES CZ competition!
It was the same 5 guys who i led into victory for the Raputre Gaming competition!
Lost to Fleming’s team that day though. But it was a good game

And yes, it was definitely cool to have Gaming competitions in NUS.

And what are the rewards of playing hard while studying hard?

Winning prizes of course!

---

Why do people worry over the less important things in life?
For almost many weeks, I’ve seen the same girl cry over a loss of marks.
Or simply because she made a careless mistake in her quiz.
I asked myself, if i were like her, i should’ve cried buckets of tears by now.
It got me thinking why people actually pay so much attention to material things?
Does it ultimately mean that security can be secured by a degree?
Does this imply that one’s efforts should be proportional
to the kind of future they should have?
And so i realised that maybe I was the odd one out…
Always just taking things in a stride, giving a shrug when i fail my paper,
or whether things just don’t seem to go on right.
Then I saw this in the afternoon on an envelope….

I remembered it clearly… and this means…
“I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you;
I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing”

Now I realise why I’m”different”
Why I don’t shed a tear at a downfall,
Or why I don’t seem to be affected by a horrific failure.
It’s because… For 22 years of my life,
There was never a time my God forsaken me.
And I know that I know that,
my future will be as bright as the sun because of what he shall do for me.
Whether I pass of fail, whether I do this or that,
There’s a power and assurance that he gives me.
Thank you Lord! and thank you for my Tomorrow.

“Mandarin Oranges & Ang Paos…
 A Grandmother with her children and granchildren,
Laughing and having good Fun with each other.
These are segments from a typical Chinese New year commercial.
Alas, Ideals can never be a reality.

I turned to her and watched her solemn face smile.
It seems that she’s forgotten my name, yet she smiles at me like she knows me.
There I gently touched her wrinkled skin to say “how are you,”
But looking into her eyes, I could sense a helplessness in her,
restricted by the wheelchair and that fractured arm,
All she could do was return to a gloomy slow face.

But of all the things that saddens me the most is…
There sits a woman who’s weak, lonely and old,
Yet no one listens to the things she says,
and everyone gets impatient with her because she’s hard of hearing.
All the “Big Pple” claim that we must keep her mind active,
yet NONE has kept to their word.
Perhaps they had not the time, or the oppurtunity,
But if I can sit there to watch her, and respond to her every sentence,
thought i’ve forgotten all of the Dialect I was once fluent in,
I still could understand to nod and smile.
Surely anybody can do such.

Why can’t anyone try to understand her plight?
To comprehend why she’s sad, helpless and selfless?
There sits my Grandmother who is waiting for nothing,
 so that she’ll no longer be a burden.
Many never wondered why she thinks that way,
they only scrutinise and criticise,
But they cant seem to understand,
That this woman who took care of me,
Brought me up, taught me the finer things in life,
Who cared for my welfare, watched over me…
And who was there watching TV with me when I was bored,
is now the one who’s hoping there’s someone to watch tv and talk with.

As I left I kissed  her cheek once more,
And i silently prayed that God shall shower her with affection and love,
So that she’ll be as lively as before!
To comment about that tv show,
or simply just call a friend to chat with them over the phone.
Happy Chinese New Year to all,
And remember to respect and love does that love you”

If you like Physics and Gaming like me,
You will love to play Counter-strike: Source
And official remake of the older Counter-strike using the HL2 Engine,
This game redefines everything man…
The objectives are the same but hey.. everything’s different.
all these pictures were taken in the LOWEST graphics settings on my com.

de_cbble: My mum was amazed at the architecture…

de_dust2: See the Dust in the air? gosh…

cs_office: The snow, the background and the trees. wow…

de_dust2: Another perspective… see the structures? gosh..

de_prodigy: Gosh its so nice now.. beautiful..

Look at the detail of the smoke and fire! Brownian Motion in motion!

Bullet holes on the ground! look nice.. heee

The new C4. You’ve gotta press the right combination! haha

And everything in the game moves when bullets hit or explosions occur!

Problem
was when I first played the game, I was so lousy that pple thought I
was a fake imitating Illuminaire. Grrr.. I tried to explain that I’m
the real one, but they deduced that because I was so lousy I’m the
fake. Well… now I’ve gotten better.
MUCH Better. heee

Down side if, u need a powerful desktop to appreciate this…
Cause when I run it on my laptop.. it’s horrendous. whahah
Which game obeys ALL LAWS OF CLASSICAL PHYSICS?
that has fluid mechanics, gravity and all other forces at play?
Anyway, this is the next in thing man… Totally Awesome!

Next week, Rapture Gaming together with NUS Engineering Club would
be organizing gaming tournament opened to all NUS students and
registration is FREE. Details as follows:

Games: WarcraftIII (DOTA), Counterstrike Condition Zero, Vital Signs

Engineering Bazaar – INDULGENCE

Date : 24-26 Jan 2005 (Mon – Wed)
Time : 0900-1800 daily
Venue: National University of Singapore (Open Area outside LT6)

Total Prizes worth as follows:

$2000 Creative Products Sponsored by Creative

PC Games Sponsored by iGames Asia

CSCZ:

Rounds : 24 Rounds (Maxrounds format) : 12 rounds as Terrorists and 12 rounds as Counter-Terrorists per team

- Round Time : 3 minutes

- In the case of a tie after regulation, 6 extra rounds will be played.

(3 rounds as Terrorists / 3 rounds as Counter-Terrorists per team)

- In the case of a re-tie after 6 extra rounds, as previously stated, 6 extra rounds will be played until result comes out

Maps: De_Aztec, De_Cbble, De_Dust2, De_Inferno, De_Nuke, De_Train

DOTA:

Game Version: 5.84b

Game Format: Best of 1

Game Style: -MM Mirror Match

After liberation and freedom from the semester,

I had such a great and wonderful time.

Most of the lovely memories and joy came from a girl whom I love.

Much shall be left to say later, and some should only be whispered,

But none the less I’d like to thank, my dear and darling for your love and care.
But other than this, I’ve had much time to myself and various thoughts run thru my head.
How’s my cousin in US doing? Miss him dearly..
How’s my Grandma doing while I’ve been studying?
How’s my good friends how parted with me in JC?
How are my Guiding Stars friends doing? Have i missed their Album launches?
How are the Rag Dancers doing? Coping well?
How are my Science camp OGLs and NUSSU OGLs doing?
How’s Jerry and Paul doing? How about Jess? Jacqueline? Pamela?
So many questions! hahaha
As the year comes close to an end, I see so many images flashing in my mind…
Soon I shall sum up those memories… heh.

The people I’ll be working with at the World Cyber Games.

Xtreme Force had a new team and I suggested its name to be xtC.

It means Xtreme Chaotix, and I’ll be looking forward to getting my new polo shirt!

Gaming is fun for me, but brining it to such a level is exciting.

I know we’ll probably not win,

But to compete in an international arena, is always a good fun.
Glad to know that my team’s a mixed of all ages,
Though most would expect a bunch of 13 year old kids.
Another plus point is that most of them are my juniors!
Studying in Anglo-Chinese School barker Road!
hahah, I feel like a big brother to them sometimes..
but it’s great to realise that my team of players aint a bunch of Ah bengs.
Which was the stereotype of must hardcore Counter-strike players in older times.
Speaking of games and stuff… I’ve bought my new Xmas Present!

BEHOLD: The New Slim and Sexy, Playstation 2 console!


Now I have two Playstation 2s!! The slim one’s so small!


I can fit it into my Laptop case anytime! smaller than an A4 pad!

The times are definitely changing..
Technology is advancing too quickly beyond our reach.
Yet the future sees no sign of floating cars whizzing thru air traffic,
Or of skateboards that levitate in the debut appearance in “Back to the future.”
I wonder what Man shall accomplish in the next years ahead.
Alas, I still hope they will learn to understand the hidden truth of life.
And as for my studies, I’ve suffered a big blow to it too.
My results came out and left me devastated… feeling so, stunned and shocked.
For the first time, I feel like its almost the end of my NUS journey.
Thankfully, God spoke to me, and my parents and friends supported me..
And I realised that I shouldn’t expect much since I’ve been gaming everynight.
for the first time in my life, I shall give 100% effort to my studies..
And we shall see, what I’m TRUELY capable of.
2005… I will be waiting to Fight on.

---

First of February this year… when things were much different.

Paul’s hair was neat and short…

Jerry was studying in NUS while we were in the Army.

And now…


Paul’s hair still looks neat though he dyed it.

Jerry’s still crazy and providing the food and place.

And Jane’s hair grown longer.

My my how time flies!

It’s been so long since we’ve had a close gathering and bbq!
Bringing ack lovely memories of fellowsip burnt chicken and mahjong,
we decided to make this our own form of tradition.
so that at around the same time, we shall have this bbq year after year after year
For now, It’s time for new year celebrations!
Very soon I’d have to say, goodbye to 2004…

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<Special Secret Ending: Another Side, Another Story XII>

Hoshii no Hikari ~ Starlight
Had
a feeling that you didn’t do too well for your results from the tone we
chatted. But I can assure you I’m probably worse off than you. But the
difference here is that, it is over and I know somethings can be done
to make everything right. I’m sure you can do the same! I always
believe if I can overcome the disappointment you can. And somehow I
know you will. Trust God girl, and study well. 2005 shall be a great
year for you! The girl who spreads my
sunshine – Starlight


Saikou no Hikari ~ Zil
I
was absolutely surprised and touched and very pleased this month!
Thanks for your effort in putting up my Xmas gift dear. I really really
appreciate it. I can almost picture every stick, pulp of glue and
detail u’ve done for me. And you baked your first cookie and brownie
for me! I can’t tell you how much I appreciate all you’ve done. Thanks
once more my dear. hehe.. hope you liked my humble card and ring. It’s
been how long already? haha enough to convince my mum eh? heh. It’s
been quite a ride for you i must say, and I thank you for doing so much
for me. 2005 shall be great for us ya? I’ll prove it… and dear,
remember what I said to you ya? Remember the Ring. It was that same
ring that marked my singlehood, but had another meaning. You know what
I say of this.. and I hope you’ll trust in my promise. Take it as my little circle of Trust. heh My supreme light, the one who brings me joy -
Zil