August 24, 2004

• "Isn't it Beautiful?
  To see you smile through that door,
  To be close enough to feel your warmth,
  And to be shower you my undying will...
  Yet in return I almost never get to be with you alone,
  To say and share my story with you in another world.
  Sadness runs through my veins whenever I recall,
  But almost immediately sends me flying away whenver I see you again.
  To wait endlessly for a time of paradise...
  To wait in uncertainty and doubtful chaos...
  Only made worthwhile because it is you.

  As my songs in my heart cry a falling tear,
  Only the hopes in my dreams can remove those fears.
  The rain moves slowly across me as time takes a toll,
  A dream may have faded away revealing another sad song.
  A journey of unrest and quiet tears,
  begins and ends only to begin again...
  For you I can do only eveything,
  Yet for you I may have done nothing.
  If God may let me be,
  My Final Fantasy shall be all but complete in due time.
  Because of you and your smile,
  Isn't it Beautiful?"

  So many things had been happening lately.
  Seems that life's getting more interesting and all...
  No longer peaceful and monotonous,
  But enriching as everyday goes by...
  The experiences I had, the memories I held,
  They come back to me all the time....
  From the candles in the wind, under the night sky of stars...
  To the simple smile you gave when I said "I do this for you"

  After that day at the bash, I came to learn some truths...
  That is, I'm not the only one with emotional problems.
  But unlike them I take it in a different view..
  Some want to hold on the past never letting go...
  Some are afraid to discover and explore...
  Some are waiting for answers to appear...
  Some are angry because of situations...
  When I look at myself, I can't seem to find any expression.
  I don't know to feel satisfied or distraught.
  I was amazed to find out that there are some who held me in high regard.
  Some expressed their utmost respect and admiration,
  yet i feel I'm just the same as any other..
  Torn between what I should fight for, and what I want for.

  Oh well, anyway life in NUS was meant to be a challenge.
  For those who are running for elections, a heavy truth unfolds..
  And that is - It shall not be an easy road.
  As for me, already slowly feeling ostracised because of Bizcom,
  I know where my limits are.
  I know I cannot committ as much as the seniors in SCMC,
  and thus i can only assist in the Sub-com.
  Seems like many things are unfolding too fast...
  and as the week goes by, i can only be strong..
  If not, stronger. mwahahha...

  My new room in Prince George Park.. hee

  
  That's my pillows! Got many of them. The flowery bed sheets were given by my mum.
  
  That's my arsenal of snacks.... already half gone by the time i typed this..
  
  That's the mystery girl of my poems.. and song. hee
  
  That's my room... looks empty? but it's what i need
  

  • 9:57 am
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